So, I logically did the big-kid-I'm-going-to-be-a-grown-up thing... Move to a big city and try and make it work out. I accepted a full time nanny job for a family that lived close and seemed great. Yet here I am, giving my two weeks notice for that. Their son is three and is showing all the signs of autism, and I'm in way over my head.
Now, I'm definitely the type of person to try and make anything and everything work, especially for the fact that if I continue to work for them I can pay my rent, buy a car, save money for Europe next summer and still have a social life. But I would be miserable for the fact that I don't know what I'm doing with him, I feel completely incompetent, and that is NEVER a good feeling, and honestly one that I don't have very often at all. I'm used to being proficient at the very least at everything I do.
So now I get to float back into the land of "I don't know what the heck I'm doing with my life", but I know that this job isn't right for me. But the question is... is this the real world? Is this what it's going to be like? Floating from job to job until I finally find something right? I don't know if it's my age or the fact that I want to have an artistic career... but the hours of 9-5 seem so unappealing.
When we were graduating, two of my best friends had the best word for this: HUSTLE. And it works. Myra is making stunning work (http://tribune.com.pk/multimedia/slideshows/377872/) and making me feel like I should pick my damn camera up and do SOMETHING and Keia is designing and showing in Chicago next weekend, and her work gets better and better all the time (http://www.keiabarua.com/).
So now I get to go get on hustling. I'll let y'all know how that goes. The whole grown up thing.
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